But He Didn't Stick Around and Make Me Coffee In the Morning

Well, evidently the Want Monster is paying me nighttime visits now, because yesterday I woke up with a Want-On.

You know how sometimes you'll see something and it'll percolate in your brain for a while without your really realizing it and then all of a sudden a vision will pop into your head and you'll be obsessed by it?

No? Really? Is that just me?

At any rate, that's what happened this week. I woke up Tuesday morning and I desperately needed a belt. But not just any belt -- a wiiiiiiiiide belt. More of a corselet, really, something so wide that it becomes a piece of clothing on its own. Here, I believe, is what's been percolating in my squishy little fashion brain:

Dolce & Gabbana. I don't even have to tell you how crazy that coat makes me, do I? It's red, it's leather, it's metallic... Oh, I think I need a moment alone...

More D&G. Leopard-print fur wrapped in tulle. I might faint.

Missoni. Dangit, that thing is art. I am besotted with this belt. I woke up thinking about that belt.

I saw these and loved them at the time (the Fall 2007). The D&G stuff has been everywhere -- every magazine I've gotten for the last few months has had huge double-page spreads featuring these belts, and they've really grown on me. So now I feel like I want one.

"Feel like I want one" might be putting it a bit mildly. "Foaming at the mouth for one" is perhaps a more accurate turn of phrase.

Belts have been very important the last couple of seasons, but I haven't been as belt-focused as some of the editors have told me I should be. I have snagged a couple of great patent-leather (no surprise there) ones that I've gotten a ton of use from, but so far the "statement" belt has yet to grab me. Now, all of a sudden, wham!

I'm blaming the tango classes.

Look at that Missoni belt -- wearing it would feel like having someone's hands wrapped around your ribcage, holding you. This is a feeling I love, and am being reminded of it at this tango class I'm taking, having a man wrap his arm around my waist and glide me around the room. Suddenly, I want to wear a big ol' neon sign that says, "Place hands here!" and that belt would sure do the trick, huh?

So off I went in search of that lovely Missoni creation, and it wasn't hard to find. Popped right up on Net-A-Porter:

(Seriously, it's like a piece of sculpture, isn't it? Amazing...)

and all it'll cost me is $1486.00. (Plus S&H, bien sûr.)

Ummmmmm, okay. Maybe not.

Seriously -- 1500 beans is a helluva lot of money for some leather strips to wrap around your waist. I am seriously considering heading off to the Tandy Leather shop to buy some laces and a grommet puncher and try a little high-fashion D-I-Y. But it's a bargain compared to the D&G, which, near as I can tell, is going for over $3000.

Yep. Three Gs. Three large. Next!

This is a nifty little perfed gold leather Fendi number that I really love, but it's still going to set me back $635.00. Nope.

Miu Miu. Fantastic belt. Can someone tell me why, though, belts are so dingdong expensive??

At this point, it's time for Style Spy to fall back & re-group, and hit the Interwebs on her trusty PowerBook to see what she might actually be able to afford. I share the results with you. (As always, click for links.) (Also, another couple of pricey ones sneaked into this batch, but they were so pretty I had to show them to you. Sorry!)

I think this is gorgeous, and love how soft the leather looks. I think the soft leather is really important in my case because while I do have a rather small waist, the pear-shaped part of me flares out rather dramatically underneath it, so a belt that's too rigid tends to cut into me.

I'm a sucker for woven leather.

Nice & wide, with glossy buckles.

I'm very intrigued by this one -- it only has one skinny belt across the back, so I think it would be very forgiving to wear. On the other hand, I'd probably feel like I could only wear it with a dress because that skinny strap would never, ever stay met up with the waist of whatever skirt or pants I was wearing and I would be fussing with it constantly.

This is definitely on my list. I love the triple straps, the toughness of it, and the fact that it's under 60 bucks. I'm very likely to be ordering this soon. I have a lot of great white blouses that could be really jazzed up by this bad boy.

Again, extremely intrigued but mighty unsure. Perhaps a little too Lingerie Dept. waist cincher, huh? On the other hand, could be very sexy with the right thing.

This is the bargain of the bunch, from Newport News (go ahead -- click to see how cheap it is!) and I am definitely ordering it. It runs the risk of being a little too Mr. Pearl, but I can make it Dita von Teese.

Fabulous black patent -- possibly perfect. From Ferragamo, a company that knows its way around a piece of leather.

More patent. Really love this, and the obi style would make it very adjustable.

Similar belt, in softer leather. Great-looking.

Another killer bargain from Newport News. (Also, how much do I love that blouse? Style Spy does adore a bishop sleeve.)

An important note: I am 5'6", flat-chested, and long-waisted, which means I can get away with a pretty wide belt. If you are petite or short-waisted, this is a much trickier look to pull off, especially if you have a prominent bust. If any of those descriptors hold true for you, scale back on the width. The top of your belt should not be in the same place as the bottom of your bra, unless you are going for the Rennaissance Faire beer wench look, in which case why are you even reading this blog?

So there you go. A buncha belts. If anyone spies any other fabulous ones, I hope you'll let me know. I know I'm supposed to be telling you about the Spring Collections this week and I promise I'm going to, but this belt thing just took over my brain. Fashion is a fickle mistress, you know.



Photos: Style.com, Net-A-Porter.com, NeimanMarcus.com, ShopBop.com, Bluefly.com, Saks.com, yoox.com, Newport-News.com, Armaniexchange.com

The Lucky Few

The Dodo by Manolo Blahnik, a shoe that as we all know I have a long history with:

So long that my browser still remembers the address, and so today I found out that a few lucky people can get this baby on sale for $201.00, plus tax & delivery. But be warned -- it is a very few: they only have 5.5s in silver, and 8s in black and red. (And this shoe runs quite small, the 8 is more like a 7.5) So this post is probably more a tease as much as anything useful or informative, but I've got my fingers crossed that there's one lucky size 7.5 gal out there who just squealed with delight and whipped out her credit card. Oh, I really hope so.

Believe me, you won't regret it!

I Told You So

Forgive me for being smug, but I seem to recall making a prediction after the last round of runway shows, said prediciton being, "I'm going on the record right now and saying that Marc Jacob's Fall 2007 Collection will be the most influential one to come out of New York this season." So far I seem to be right. There is a truckload of 30's-meets-70's stuff bouncing down the runway so far this week. Take a look:

It's the slouchy pants. Those high-waisted slouchy pants are EVERYWHERE. Which is good -- raise your hand if your sick unto death of skinny pants!

Those are all from Nicole Miller, and I find them all very "They Shoot Horses, Don't They?" Love the pattern on that printed dress, and the blue gown -- oh, so pretty.


Even Badgley Mischka, usually the label that cranks out red carpet gowns like Ford cranks out pickup trucks, showed more separates this season, and some had that same feel.

More slouchy pants! I love it!

And just in case you were feeling gown-deprived, here's one from them

This is more 20's influenced, to my eye, that seaming just screams "Art Deco." But still -- great dress. (Unless of course, you have any hips whatsoever, in which case you should avoid it like the plague. Luckily for James & Mark, most of the gals who wear their gowns don't have hips.)

I was surprised by how much I liked the Abaeté collection

Laura Poretzky brought a little more disco with her 30's

Which is not typically my favorite era but I really liked the ease and clean lines of these dresses, and the colors knocked me out.

So far nothing I've seen has approached the ultra-chic severity of Jacobs' Fall show, but the silhouette is definitely headed in that direction -- long, lean, tailored, sharp. I've seen lots of good clothes, some great clothes, but nothing so far that has made me sit up and yelp, or utter the Spicoli-like "Whooooa!" that came out of me when I saw Prada last time around. Of course, I'm still a day behind on the shows, because unfortunately I still have a life and can't do nothing but sit around and look at pretty pictures and then tell you about them. Also, much as I depend on Style.com, it's a little bit evil, that site. After three or four runways worth of photos my browser is usually so gummed up with whatever sort of intergoo that place excretes that I have to close it and re-boot, or things get verrrrrrry slow, with lots of those little whirly rainbow circles that indicate my computer is having a bit of a migraine. Does anyone else have this problem?

Okay, my clicking thumb is pooped -- more later!

Photos: Style.com

Let Me Fall Out of the Window With Confetti in My Hair

I have a deep need to be slinky.

It has always been my fondest desire to be a slinky, sinuous femme fatale. I'm a Leo, for goodness sake, and my Chinese zodiac sign is the Snake. I should be feline and serpentine and... well, slinky.

Alas, I am not. Style Spy is far too pear-shaped to ever qualify as a good slink material, for which is necessary the wearing of the bias-cut satin dress

(Jean Harlow. Dang, huh?)

which, trust me, I should never do. My slink runneth over, and will not be contained by the bias-cut. Also crucial to slinkiness is the smoldering look

(Gene Tierney. Who smoldered like nobody's business.)

but when I attempt to smolder I mostly just look like I've eaten some bad sushi and need to get home quick.

So I shall have to content myself with cultivating a slinky aura, a personality steeped in slink, and I took a step in that direction this week by enrolling in a beginning tango class.

I love to dance. I'm a fairly experienced swing dancer, I studied ballet as a child, I have been known to embarrass myself pretty thoroughly to tunes sung by His Purple Majesty. I've always wanted to tango, and it happens there's a class going on that fits into my schedule.

Another fun thing about tango is -- it requires shoes!! (Surely you could see where this was going, right?)

Well, yes, of course, now that you mention it, I do already have lots of shoes.

But you can't tango in just any shoes. There are requirements for shoes you are going to wear when you're doing something like the tango. First off, they need to have a heel, but not a tremendously high heel -- I think between 2 and 3 inches is about perfect. They need to not have a non-skid sole, because you have to be able to slide around and pivot on your foot when you dance. They can't be a platform -- you need to be in touch with the floor. Probably most importantly, they have to stay on your foot -- as a follow in tango you're going to mostly be moving backwards, and you can't wear a shoe you're going to step out of. No slides or slingbacks -- the shoe has to have a t-strap or quarter-strap or some combination thereof. Even a full-on high ankle strap isn't that useful, because you need something that is going to keep your foot in the bed of the shoe. Like this:

(Actual dance shoe. Not actual size.)

So believe it or not, when I factored all these things together, I didn't have a pair of shoes that fit the bill, at least not any I was willing to put in the position of suffering ignominious treatment at the hands of (at the feet of) some lead-footed lunkhead. Because the thing about a beginning-level dance class is that all the students are beginning-level and you know what that means -- much treading upon the toes. Call me selfish, but I decided that I'd rather not subject a pair of the ol' Manolos to such potential insults, so I was looking for nice, inexpensive-but-goodlooking pair of shoes to wear to my class.

As I cast about looking for the right shoe, it occurred to me that I was finding some good all-purpose dress shoes that a person could easily wear to the office or out to dinner as well as to execute a few ochos, and that I might as well share my research with the general public (I believe in open-source retail). So here you are. Click on any photo for a link.

Also available in black -- I think the heel on these is interesting, & love the strappiness around the back.

I like the texture on these a lot and again, nifty heel. They come in some other colors, but quite honestly, they're kinda heinous. Stick with the black.

Straps galore! Also available in brown with gold trim.

From Naturalizer, believe it or not. Also comes in black, but who could resist the pink? Slingbacks, two quarter straps, AND a t-strap! Your foot's not going anywhere in these bad boys.

Hot-cha! You feel slinkier just looking at those shoes, don't you? Also in black and silver, available in sizes 5.5 - 11 and again -- from Naturalizer!

¡Fantastico! ¡Yo quiero bailar ahora mismo! They come in black, brown and dark purple patent. I don't wear a lot of purple, but these are enough to make me re-think that. How gorgeous would those be with a camel-colored suit?

And finally, a note about the title of today's post, which will seem complete nonsense to anyone who isn't a rabid fan (as I am) of a certain American musician. So let's make it into a contest: first person who posts a comment with the name of the artist and the title of the song gets a prize! I've got a brand new pair of Apara Steppies and a tube of Johnson & Johnson Blister Block waiting for the winner -- treats to make your feet feel good enough to tango!


Photos: MovieMaidens.com, DiscountDanceSupply.com, Zappos.com, Naturalizer.com

Spring Ahead

Today is the first day of the current New York Fashion Week, and hence the kickoff for London, Milan & Paris Fashion Weeks to follow. Much as I have trouble wrapping my mind around this, the season that will be showing over the next month is Spring/Summer 2008. Oy. I can barely get this week's to-do list dealt with. And there was all kinds of stuff from the Fall shows I still wanted to talk about. Oh, well. I'll just point out a few designers whose shows I'm really looking forward to this time around, with some pics from their last outings...

Marc Jacobs

I absolutely unreservedly adored every single thing about this show, down to the hats & amazing belts, and it seems every fashion editor in the world felt the same way. This sharp, luxe, tailored 1930's-by-way-of-Studio-54 silhouette is everywhere this fall, and hip-hipless hooray -- it's gorgeous. Marc had an eventful year last year (a little rehab with his runway), so I'm wondering if he wants to continue in this mold or throw down something completely new.

Alexander McQueen

I've got two closets. I've got my "A" closet, which has the stuff I wear on a day-to-day basis, and I've got my "B" closet, which has out-of-season and special occasion clothes. Last season's "Dark Magicks" show from McQueen was pretty strictly "B" closet stuff, but it was stunning as usual. Mr. McQueen seems to swing back & forth between "showpiece" collections and ones you can actually put on & walk down the street, so I've got my fingers crossed that he gives us something to put in our "A" closets this time around.

Nina Ricci

Squirming with anticipation to see what my boy Olivier Theyskens brings us for his second full show at Nina Ricci, especially after this gorgeous, breathless inaugural. Theyskens still has my vote for the designer working right now with the most untapped potential -- I predict he's going to be one of the most influential designers of his generation, if only some clever house can support him properly and give him the time & space to unfold. If you had the means and didn't snap up every piece from this collection you could get your hands on, you're a fool. Not only is it stunning, it's going to be museum-worthy in 20 years. Collectors' items all, especially anything with the spiral seaming and raw edges. (It'll be going on sale in the next couple of months -- keep your eyes peeled.) Betcha this will be a very hot ticket in Paris -- they're going to need extra security, and not just for Ms. Witherspoon, sitting front & center.

Anne Klein

Isabel Toledo ROCKED her first collection for the venerated American sportswear label with a runway full of stuff I want to wear RIGHT NOW. Pulled-together, professional, and fierce, every bit of it -- I can't wait to see if the company allows her to continue in this mode.

Burberry Prorsum

I think Christopher Bailey gets better and better every year. This show full of ferocious mod-warrior gauntlet gloves and gorgeous fitted coats embellished with metallics and quilting might have been enough to make Jeanne d'Arc forget the voices in her head.

Comme des Garçons

Rei Kawakubo does pink & girly????? Good googly-moogly!!! At first I thought it was a sign of the Apocalypse, and then I just went with it. And loved it. All these years later, this woman still surprises and enlightens when she designs. Rock on, Rei.

Prada

Oh, I know a lot of people didn't get it, and I've no idea how well it's selling despite the flood of editorial attention this collection has gotten, but I absolutely adored it. The amazing, creative fabric treatments, the radical re-silhouette-ing, the undiluted Miuccia-ness of it all. I so want to be Miuccia Prada when I grow up.

Oh, there's more, of course, but that'll do for now. I'm just hoping I have enough time to check everything out. Who are you looking forward to seeing? And does anyone have a ticket to the Nina Ricci show they'd like to get rid of?

Photos: Style.com

Judge Not, Lest Ye Be Judged (or Ye Be a Fashion Blogger)

Imagine this scenario: You've just gotten engaged. Your fiancé has presented you with this little trinket

and you are thrilled to shiny bits about it. Every time you look at your sparkler your heart does a little shimmy of joy. When you meet up with some friends and share your exciting news, you are of course wearing your treasure. Now imagine I say to you, "Oooh, let me see your ring!" You blush and raise your hand to eye level and I inspect it and make approving cooing noises and then I say,

"That's really beautiful, but I would never, EVER spend that much money on a piece of jewelry."

::blinkblink::

This would take you aback a tiny bit, non? As a matter of fact, I think a lot of folks would consider it downright rude.

But I hear it aaaaaaall the time. (Or at least a variation.) I heard it again this weekend.

"Those are really great, but I would never, EVER spend that much money on a pair of shoes."

(To which I usually want to respond, "Who asked you to?")

This happens to me pretty frequently. Someone compliments my shoes, asks me where I got them or what brand they are, and then when I say something like, "Saks" or "Manolo Blahnik," that's what I get.

Sometimes it's said in tones of wistful, wishful longing. But more often it's uttered with that chilly contempt most people reserve for politicians whose views they find particularly heinous.

What is that? Are they defending themselves or condemning me? Or both? And who asked them, anyway? What am I supposed to do -- lie about my shoes?? I don't get it. I mean, I really feel that way about the diamond ring. Yes, it's absolutely gorgeous, and I'm happy for everyone who has one. And I am completely uninterested. Just not my style. But pretty much every married or engaged woman I know (I'm 42 -- I've looked at A LOT of other peoples' engagement rings) has one and I have never once said the above.

There are a lot of things I would never spend "that much money" on. Great big four-bedroom houses -- not interested (even small two-bedroom houses -- I'm an apartment gal). Big lumbering SUVs -- puh-lease. Brand-new state-of-the-art shinycool cell phones that you have to stand in line to buy. Golf clubs (sorry, that's a hobby that completely eludes me). Any sort of computerized gadget that requires a joystick. Gambling in Vegas (gambling anywhere, really). Season tickets to any sporting event (seriously, kill me), much less traveling cross-country to a game held in a "Bowl" (seriously, kill me now). Zippy English sports cars whose second home is at the mechanic's. Eighteenth Century furniture (death by curlicue, anyone?). Purebred dogs or cats (I'm pro-mutt -- go to the pound!). Vacations to Disneyland or any of its offspring. Ginormous flat-screen TVs that take up an entire wall of your living room (I don't need Surround Sound McLaughlin Group, thanks). And so forth.

You know what I would spend "that much money" on?

(Roger Vivier. I don't even know how much those sandals cost. And I don't care. Oh, mon dieu... the beauty! My heart actually stopped when I saw them.)

Or this:

(Alexander McQueen. God as my witness, I would step over your bleeding body to get my hands on this dress.)

You know why? 'Cause it's my money and that's what I love.

Guy Trebay published a really thought-provoking article in the New York Times this weekend about the general scorn and disdain in which fashion is often held by so-called cultural arbiters. Now, I'll grant you -- I'm not exactly saving lives here. But if I described what I do to someone and substituted the word "art" for "fashion" ("People consult me on what art to buy," "I help people organize and maximize their art collections," etc.), it would never occur to them that what I do is frivolous. People are impressed by art historians. People are puzzled by fashion historians. But I defy you to find someone as interesting, articulate, intelligent, respected and engaged & engaging as my hero Harold Koda, the curator of the Costume Institute of the Metropolitan Museum of Art.

But for now I'm not going to bother trying to impress you with my theories of fashion's cultural, historical, and sociological relevance, although I believe them fiercely.

I spend a bucket o' money on my wardrobe. I admit it. I don't happen to believe that is a moral failing, but some people seem to. Why do you think that is?

It's not going to stop me, of course, and most of the time it doesn't even give me a moment's pause (well, unless I'm paying my credit card bill, but that's a different topic). We all have our quirks, and that's mine.

Just please - stop judging me & my shoes!

Photos: Kiamedia, Style.com, Net-A-Porter.com

A Good Dressing-Down (or Up)

Look at these great dresses I found on Overstock! (click for links)

They're all by A.B.S., which is a label that does good-quality "homages" to designer duds at much more reasonable prices. (That bottom dress is obviously a riff on Roland Mouret.)

These are good-looking rayon-spandex blend knit dresses that will take you easily through the fall. Throw on some tights, boots and a velvet blazer and they're good into winter. And that knit travels really well, I'll bet. (I'm a big proponent of the knit travel dress. Ball it up in a corner of your suitcase and forget about it -- that's the way to go.)

They're also all on sale for under 70 bucks, which makes them just about perfect. (Again I'll quibble a little about the S-M-L sizing, but I feel I'm fighting a losing battle there...)

So go! Shop already!

Photos: Overstock.com